Right before Christmas, I went to buy groceries. I stopped at my local grocery store following a hike, so I just had my fanny pack with me. Since this was an unusual Christmas and holiday season, I wanted to make it extra merry. I stocked up on baking supplies, eggnog, peppermint schnapps, flowers, etc. I was excited to bake up a storm and add in some much-needed holiday cheer, so I filled up my cart. I was feeling very merry and bright, until I had to check out.
Since it was pre-major-holiday time, the store was busy and there were long checkout lines. In my haste to get ready in the morning, I thought that I had put my credit card along with my ID, cash, and keys in my fanny pack, but I apparently had not. When the woman checking me out told me my total, I realized that I was short. I rummaged around, begging my card to magically appear, but it remained missing. I apologized profusely and told the woman working that I would need to remove some items to get down to the cash amount that I had. She kindly understood, and I surveyed the items on the conveyor belt.
The schnapps was obviously essential, so that remained. To start, the almond milk, yogurt, and, of course, my bouquet of flowers, I could part with. Although beautiful, the flowers seemed like a superfluous item compared to the food items. I was starting to hand things back when the older woman behind me in line spoke up. She said, “I’ll cover the difference.” I blushed and assured her that I had the means to pay for my groceries and that I had just forgotten my card. She insisted, “Everyone deserves flowers at Christmas.” I, again, embarrassingly repeated that there was no need for her to help. She waved a hand and responded, “It’s fine. You can pay it forward then.” I relinquished and let the lady pay the $25ish dollar difference for me.
I left, rather dumbfounded, unloaded my groceries, and got in my car. I then teared up in a Vons parking lot. At a time when I felt like there was so much chaos, hate, and divisiveness going on in the world, I was overcome by this act of generosity from a stranger. It felt exactly like the Christmas spirit that I needed; It was the true essence of the Christmas and holiday season. Without any agenda or hesitation, this woman made a choice to make a simple act of kindness.
The truth was, it wasn’t simple though. It was big. It made me cry, and it was the first thing I told Patrick about when I returned home. It was a reminder that there are wonderful people out there. That through all the nastiness and muck of the world, there is still kindness and love. There are still people that check on an elderly neighbor, or help someone on the side of the road, or cover the groceries of some mud-covered hiking girl. There are people that can be selfless, that are compassionate, and that offer light when the world goes dark.
Some days it’s tough to see that there are good humans out there. Most days I turn on the news only to feel a pit in my stomach. And a lot of days I wonder, What is going on in this world? But then you see a heart-warming video or witness a moment of selflessness, and then it’s easy to remember that there are still decent and exemplary people out there.
It doesn’t escape me that I am lucky to be in a position where I can purchase my groceries. I don’t have to worry about awkwardly putting items away or trying to keep a mental checklist of dollar amounts as I shop. When so many are suffering because of Covid-19 and job losses, it’s a privilege, and I am very aware. I also thought about the panic and shame associated with having to decide what you can afford to eat that week. I can only imagine what it’s like for a family to have to pick and choose which needed items have to wait. Everyone deserves flowers, but, most importantly, everyone deserves a full belly.
With this woman in mind, I made a donation to the Food Bank of Santa Barbara County. I quadrupled her gift to me at the grocery store because I’m lucky enough to be able to pay it forward, and I’m fortunate to not have to worry about where my next meal is coming from. This act of kindness has snowballed, and I am touched at the goodwill that this woman exhibited, and I am honored to give back.
If she ever reads this, thank you for helping out a complete stranger. Thank you for proving that there is still so much good out there in the world. Because of this woman, I had flowers at Christmas, but most importantly, I had a reminder of the true meaning of the season. Those flowers are long gone, but the memory of her benevolence very much remains.
